Why living with a boy was the best and worst decision.

I lived with a boy once. It was definitely one of my bigger life experiences. We did not live together because we liked each other or were romantically involved. I think we’d both agree that it was the exact opposite actually. I think it was the best and worst decision in both of our lives.

Cor (its really cory but I call him cor even though he despises it) and I met at a party at his house. The first words that ever came out of his mouth were yelling at me because I was doing his dishes because everyone was using his glasses since they ran out of cups. Sorry I am a nice person and domestic. Anyway for reasons we still cant figure out we somehow became friends. I don’t really know how this happened either but I ended up moving in with him. It was an experience for the books. Living with a boy you learn a lot of things. Now I am not an angel so the following points out some pros and cons of living with a guy but, living with me is no small feet either.

When the bros are over you better get over them thinking you’re a girl. Aint no filter. I learned some very repulsive things in that house. And about every girl they liked or as they liked to call them “squalls” #eyeroll.

Guys are just big boys. They love things like WWE. I can quote all the wrestlers especially the nature boy and was slammed to the ground more times than I can count. Whooo-ooo. And john wayne. For the love of everything holy John wayne. I was called “runs with scissors” for months and old cowboy movies were constantly on repeat. But Just like boys, guys can be sensitive. They have feelings too. This I learned the hard way. As girls we think that they are just tough and rough and not emotional but they actually can get their feelings hurt.

I did not poop in the house for the entire time I lived there. I don’t know why it freaked me out but I couldn’t poop with a boy around. Thankfully Shanida and Carolann at the Big Lots a mile from the house understood my situation and welcomed me with open arms. I couldn’t do other things too like walk around half naked. Or leave tampons laying around. I had to remember to lock the bathroom door when I was showering. He just didn’t understand why I needed my entire wardrobe on the floor of my bedroom because guys don’t change outfits multiple times a day.

The best thing about living with Cor was the bathtub. It really was the main reason I wanted to move in. It was a beautiful old fashion claw tub and I was madly in love with it. I also learned how to be tough. Before I moved in I was sensitive. A lot could hurt my feelings or offend me. (dont wear a coral dress and not expect him to say you look like a peach.) Cor being a boy definitely toughened me up. He would ask me why I was acting a certain way and I would start to cry. After the first time I cried he made it a house rule that no crying was allowed. So I would go in the driveway to cry since it technically wasn’t the house. Probably another reason our neighbors hated us.

I learned how to fight with a guy. I never really had. I only fought with my girlfriends which would always be just screaming and then hugging it out. Guys are different. They need to cool off first then talk it out. One time I made him so mad because I am a real brat sometimes and like to throw tantrums like a two year old. Anyway he didn’t come home for a week. Poor thing I chased him out of his own house. It taught me that sometimes they just need space. The sooner you realize too that guys are stubborn the easier your life will be. The jackwagon ruined his own surprise party because he is so stubborn.

After I moved out Cor and I quit being friends for a long time. Living together put a huge strain on our friendship. We have become friends again and stopped a few times and probably will always be on again off again friends. Just how we are. I wouldn’t change living with Cor if I had the chance. I learned some valuable things that my future husband will be grateful for when we live together. The next time I live with a boy though I will be married.

Lesson of the story: “this aint no garden party brother, this is wrestling, where only the strongest survive.”- Rick Flair.